A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To...

…on the way to my therapists office. Okay, it wasn’t actually on the way so much as in her office. I have recently changed therapists as I completed a recent stint in an Interpersonal Therapy Clinic (more on this to come). My new therapist and I are still in the “getting to know each other” phase, as this was only my second session.

As our session was progressing she suddenly paused, looked at me inquisitively and asked, “When was the last time you didn’t have to worry about your mood fluctuations?” Without skipping a beat, I I replied, “Oh. Never. Mood fluctuations have never not been an issue.” The magnitude of my statement caught me off guard. It hit me, I had never lived life without the stress of my mood in the forefront of my mind. Due to bipolar, my mood has always been and will always be a factor. On one hand, it’s hard to imagine having one thing that could possibly stress you out every hour of everyday for every year of your like. However, on the other, I have lived it. And I sure as hell don’t want to keep living it for the next however many years. There’s hope that the right combination of medicine and treatment will lead my bipolar depression to a more steady resolve. A tolerable level, I hope at least.

I guess the lesson in this was A) I am resilient and I need to give myself some credit and B) maybe there is hope for a less painfully stressful existence. There will always be stress in life but if I could tone down the bipolar and adhd a few decibels it would be a really nice change.

#bipolardepression #bipolar2 #depression #mentaldisorder #livingwithmentalillness #mentalhealthstigma #fightthestigma #bipolarII #adhd #adultadhd #mooddisorder #mood